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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  oh how i love working at summer camp.

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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge

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• (972): View more from Texas

  Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?

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• (239): View more from Florida

  I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real

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• (206): View more from Washington

  i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.

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• (469): View more from Texas

  He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line

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• (631): View more from New York

  U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole

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• (626): View more from California

  Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.

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