someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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