its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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