Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
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