Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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