I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize