you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
