So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
