Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
