Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Randomize
