'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
We need to feng shui this bitch.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
