My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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