I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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