There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
