my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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