operation harelip BJ is a go
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
