This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
