Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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