glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
