On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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