i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
