We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Randomize
