i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
honey bunches of taint.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
