The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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