where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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