i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
