Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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