Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Randomize