If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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