haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
