I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
