Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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