and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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