Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
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