just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
