New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Randomize
