i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
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