Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Randomize