just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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