remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
