wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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