brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize