if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
