I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
