ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
