just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
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