Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
