No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
