well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
