summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
