i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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