shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
