Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize